Ike Throws His Club!

            Anger can get you. Just ask President Dwight Eisenhower.

            Normally, Ike kept his emotions in check. Once, though, he was playing golf with his personal physician, Dr. Howard Snyder. Ike was having a bad back nine when he grew furious about a shot he hit with his sand wedge on hole number 17. Dr. Snyder did not think the shot was so bad and told him, “Fine shot.”

            Eisenhower exploded and threw his sand wedge at the doctor. The shaft of the club wrapped itself around the Dr. Snyder’s shin; meanwhile, the club head barely missed. Had it struck him, it would have broken his leg.

            Watch out for anger!

Whoever is slow to anger has great understanding, but he who has a hasty temper exalts folly (Prov. 14:29 ESV.)

Source: IKE’S BLUFF by Evan Thomas

Going to Bed Angry

            Husbands and wives should never go to bed angry. There is an old story about a husband and wife who were experiencing a conflict. They each resorted to the classic “silent treatment.”

            Then the man realized he would need his wife, who was an early riser, to awaken him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and lose), he wrote on a piece of paper before bedtime, "Please wake me at 5:00 AM."

            The next morning the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and that he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife had not awakened him when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.

            The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”

            Conflict can hurt relationships. It is impractical.

            One way to address conflict is to address anger. Paul shared these words of practical advice, “’In your anger do not sin’: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold” (Eph. 4:26-27 NIV.)           

            Those are good words to live by.

           

Vent, not Sent

            The story is told that Salmon Chase, the Treasury Secretary in Abraham Lincoln’s administration, lamented to Lincoln about an individual he had failed to write, “Oh, I am so sorry that I did not write a letter to him before I left home!”

            The President replied, “Chase, never regret what you don’t write; it is what you do write that you are often called upon to feel sorry for.”

            Lincoln would have known. After his death, archivists found strongly worded letters in his files—never sent.

            Sometimes, a letter is better deployed when not sent, but rather when it serves as a private and personal vent. 

A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back (Prov. 29:11.)

Seven "Deadly" Sins

             I am about to begin a sermon series on “Seven Life-Affirming Virtues.” What I plan on doing is staking out the territory God inhabits (the virtue), and addressing the two extremes that flank either side. Both flanks are sins. For example: the virtue humility is flanked on one side by pride (too high a view of one’s self) and on the other side by low self-esteem (too low a view of one’s self.)

            My story this morning concerns an article I read about DISCIPLESHIP magazine back in 1992. In the article, readers individually responded to a survey by communicating to the editors of the periodical the greatest spiritual challenge of each reader.

            Here is how they ranked:

               1. Materialism

              2. Pride

              3. Self-centeredness

              4. Laziness

              5. (Tie) Anger/Bitterness

              6. (Tie) Sexual lust

              7. Envy

              8. Gluttony

              9. Lying

            If you count materialism as greed, you find all seven of the traditional “seven deadly sins” present.  Notice none of these sins will get you thrown in jail. None will even get you disfellowshipped from today’s churches. As far as the secular and spiritual cultures are concerned, you and I can practice these sins with impunity—free from unpleasant consequences.

            Maybe that is why these sins are called “deadly.”

Anger vs. Exasperation

            Ralph L. Woods wrote several years ago about a father, who wanted to illustrate to his son the difference between anger and exasperation. He looked up the phone number of a pompous fellow whom he knew only by name and reputation, and he dialed the number.

            When the gentleman answered the phone, the father asked, “Is Adolph there?”

            “There’s no Adolph here. Why don’t you get the right number before bothering people this hour of the night?” roared the man on the other end.

            “Now that,” said the father when he put down the phone, “was simply annoyance. We’ll wait a few minutes, and then you’ll hear something.”

            After a decent interval, the father dialed the same number and again asked, “Is Adolph there?”

            This time the other party literally screamed into the phone, “What’s the matter with you, are you crazy? I told you to look up the number and stop bothering me!” whereupon the receiver at the other end was slammed down.

            “Now that fellow was angry,” said the father. In a few minutes I will show you what I mean by exasperation compared to anger.

            After 15 minutes or so, the father dialed the same number for the third time, and when the same man answered at the other end, the father said almost cheerily, “Hello, this is Adolph. Have there been any messages for me during the past half hour or so?”

            Does this story help explain this verse from the Apostle Paul, “4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord” Eph. 6:4)? NIV 1984

Anger Management

            Winnsboro, TX youth minister Tony Tucker ran this story in a bulletin recently. The author is unknown. It goes like this:

            A guy gets in a taxi one day headed to the airport. The taxi was driving in the right lane when, suddenly, a car pulled out in front of the taxi. The taxi driver hit the brakes. The taxi skidded and barely avoided hitting the car.

            The driver of the other vehicle began shouting at the taxi driver. Bizarre, right? What was his problem?

            The taxi driver did not respond in kind. Instead, he simply smiled and waved.

            The passenger was amazed. He asked him how he was able to keep his cool.

            The taxi driver kept his cool because of “The Law of the Garbage Truck.”

            “The Law of the Garbage Truck” refers to the fact that many people are like garbage trucks. They operate in life full of frustration, anger, disappointment… in other words, full of garbage.

            In time, their garbage truck becomes too full. They need to dump some of their garbage. When they do, that place may be—on you.

            The key is to not take it personally when they dump their garbage. Smile. Wave at them. Wish them well. Then, move on.

            Never take their garbage with you and spread it on other people you know at home, school, work, or anywhere else.

A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger (Prov. 15:1.) ESV

Christian Speech

            Years ago, I heard a story about a woman, who had major surgery on her throat. The worst part came afterwards—she was not able to talk for six months. Having a husband and six children, this proved daunting.

            The family worked out a system; any time the mother needed one of the kids, she blew a whistle.  She carried a little note pad throughout the house, which allowed her to quickly scribble a note when needed.

            After six months, she was a changed woman. She also noticed that her kids behaved better than at any time, since they had been born.

Ultimately, she decided, “I'm never going to holler again.”  She further testified, “You would not believe how many of those notes I tore up and threw away, after I read what I wanted to say."

Amish Anger

             Here is an account that gave me pause:

An author for READERS DIGEST writes how he studied the Amish people in preparation for an article on them. In his observation at the school yard, he noted that the children never screamed or yelled. This amazed him. He spoke to the schoolmaster. He remarked how he had not once heard an Amish child yell, and asked why the schoolmaster thought that was so. The schoolmaster replied, Well, have you ever heard an Amish adult yell?

Counter Attack, Jay Carty, Multnomah Press, 1988, p. 41ff

A Soft Answer

A proverb I always try to remember is Prov. 15:1, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

A good example of how hard it is to live out this teaching is found in a story appearing in READER’S DIGEST several years ago:

            A woman who frequented a small antiques shop rarely purchased anything but always found fault with the merchandise and prices. The manager and her salesclerk took the woman's grumpy complaints in stride, but one day she went too far. "Why is it I never manage to get what I ask for in your shop?" demanded the woman.

            A smile on her face, the clerk calmly replied, "Perhaps it's because we're too polite."

Danger!

“Anger is just one letter short of Danger!”

--Source unknown

Breaking the Chain

Tony Fears is a great guy and a member of our church. His dad, S. W. Fears, died last year. I attended the funeral.

Tony spoke at his dad’s funeral and told a story that made an impression on me. He gave me permission to use it, and here is the story.

Back in the 1930s, S. W. Fears and his family lived in a boarding house, near downtown Tyler. During this period, when S. W. was around five or six years old, he would enjoy dangling his legs off the front porch of the boarding house and watching the trains go by on the railroad tracks—tracks, which were literally just a few feet away.

One day, S. W. saw a train approaching that was headed out of Tyler. As the train passed, he saw a man inside a boxcar waving at him. He excitedly waved back. It was not until the boxcar had passed that he realized the man who had waived at him, was his father.

Unknown to him at the time, his father was leaving. Leaving for good. S. W.’s father was abandoning him and his mom. His life was going to change forever. He would now be raised by his mother and his beloved aunt.

As you might imagine, this event would affect S. W. for the rest of his life. Ultimately, he chose for it to impact him in a positive way.

When S. W. was a young man, he came to realize that if he was to live a productive life, he had to get rid of the hate and anger that his father’s abandonment had created within him. And so, S. W. made a conscious decision—if he ever had children, he would be the best father that any child could possibly have.

S. W. was determined to be nothing like his dad. He would be a loyal and devoted companion to his wife. He would take the sorry last name, his father had given him, and he would do everything in his power to change it. He would attempt to live his life in such a way, he could bestow upon his children and his grandchildren a name they would be proud to receive. It would be a name deserving respect.

I can tell you, as the preacher to the children and grandchildren, S. W. succeeded. “Fear” is a word that normally does not have a positive connotation. In Tyler, the name “Fears” is a word of honor.

“Gator-guzzling python comes to messy end”

A few years ago, I came across an article on MSNBC with the aforementioned title. A 13-foot Burmese python, who had escaped his owner or been let go in the Florida Everglades, had come upon a six-foot-long alligator and thought he saw a delicious supper. He was mistaken. What he thought would satisfy his appetite, instead created a mess, according to authorities, of horror-movie proportions.

Frank Mazzotti, a University of Florida wildlife professor, summarized the catastrophe in this way: the alligator evidently clawed at the python’s stomach as the snake was attempting to digest it. When experts arrived on the scene, the alligator’s legs were protruding from the snake’s midsection. By then, the snake was dead.

Through the years, I have seen folks who thought they found the ideal meal to satisfy their appetites, only to arrive at similar ends. Some swallowed substances that created life-destroying addictions. Others found their insides torn up from worry. Still others burned up internal organs from ingesting anger.

Jesus seemed to understand the human appetite is potentially dangerous and we need to satisfy it in a proper manner. After all, it was Jesus who said, “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.”